A Stranger in the Watering Hole

Hello, Wistonians. I must admit that I am in a state of shock right now. Pet #1 did a horrible thing to me tonight. It was so terrible that I wasn’t even sure I could share it with you all, but being a celebrity (yes, I am a celebrity in the canine world–just ask your dogs about me) means that your life is an open book, so here goes… Pet #1 was in the “watering hole” (or shower, as the humans call it) and I was sandwiched between the watering hole curtain and the clear curtain, per usual. I don’t particularly enjoy being submerged in water, however I absolutely love to lick the water beads off of my pets’ skin. From time to time, one of my pets will scoop me up and pull me in, but that wasn’t the case today… As I was patiently waiting in the wings for a drizzling limb to come my way, I saw what appeared to be a strange man in my pets’ watering hole. I saw the ugliest creature with mud on its’ face. And mind you, Pet #1 is a female, so you can only imagine the thoughts that were running through my head. Did I miss something? Did someone break in and abduct Pet #1? Am I the worst guard dog ever? I began barking, growling, snarling, and doing just about anything I could to intimidate said stranger in my watering hole. This went on for about 2 minutes while the mysterious mud-faced man laughed hysterically at me. He closed the curtain and I had a few seconds to regain my composure and figure out what the heck was going on. When the curtain opened again, I saw my beautiful pet. I was hesitant at first, but after I was one-hundred percent sure it was her, I began licking her face, as she was crouched over the ledge. Pet #1 then explained what face masks are and how they make her feel pretty. Whatever. I have banned face masks in our home now.